My First Lula

I figured this would be an appropriate marker of blog change.

Yes, the magazine everyone has heard of and the girl everyone wants to be is finally in my mitts. I've been fascinated by this magazine for a long time - all the girly Coppola-esque connotations it has (lemme simplify, I'm falling asleep as I write this: blurred 70s-style images, generally very beautiful) etc. and from skimming through it, it does appear to be very childlike but has some perverse undertones - for example, the beautiful naivety of the Zac Posen photo shoot featured with leather (Luella-reminiscent) masks, revealed stockings etc. Saucy stuff, I'm sure you'll agree.

I don't know if it's just in this specific issue or whatnot (not like I can really draw any comparison), but in some of the interviews, I almost felt uncomfortable from all the excessive whimsy-ness and distant replies:
"When did you first know you wanted to be a designer?
I guess a year ago."
...Expand maybe? No? Fair enough.
I did like that the interview was like a conversation, with the interviewer sharing their favourite flowers rather than just the mechanical 'Q-A-Q-A' we're so used to.

Right, articles.
A fabulous article was on 'outsider girls' and then sweet illustrations of cult 'outsider girl' icons, two featured below:

Now I'm a huge fan of Margot Tenenbaum (that montage of her secret life with 'Judy Is A Punk' playing, ugh, kills me) and I don't remember The Incredibles that well so I lack an opinion on Violet Parr..
Anyway, the article, it's the author's reminiscence of a girl (Mallory Bates) who was the school's outsider then comments on how the outsider character always seems to stick in our minds (clearly not Violet for me though..).
It's one of my favourite articles that I've read thus far and made me consider my own "outsiders". The only ones I can think of were ostracised for their disabilities or shabby uniform but the girl described in the article was dark-haired with a long fringe and pencilling "intricate drawings that suggested a rich inner life". Unfortunately (to my knowledge) this girl didn't exist in my year of school (I wish she did, she sounds amazing) but it did get me thinking - perhaps we were the 'outsider girls'.
I know I certainly am now.

I'm struggling to comment on the photography and layout of the magazine. The photography is (like I vaguely described above) quite dreamy and natural in appearance for most of it - I did love the images of Floria Sigismondi and her daughter.
I love the introduction to each article/photo shoot as well, the font wouldn't look lost on a poster advertising a circus. My one small annoyance with the magazine is the font, where it is very sweet and does capture the ideals of the magazine, the 'w' looks way too much like an obscure 'r' and disrupted my reading on more than 100 occasions. Just kidding, I got used to it soon enough.

Hm, this is short but, like I said, I'm tired and lazy.
K
x

Warning, Potentially Pretentious.

Living in dreams of sanctuaries and romance is what I do best.
Seeing trees as virginal and untouched as a baby give a secure feeling to an insecure being.
I was certainly alone at that point.
Wondering which forest I was discovering this time, I looked up to see variants of cloud colours filling the sky - some looking seconds away from raining but I didn't mind.
Walking on and mindlessly playing with my hands for what could've been ten minutes, I found what could be called a path but was more of a scar from ramblers who'd also discovered the forest. Feeling disheartened as my discoverer persona disintegrated into just a tourist of my own thoughts, I decided to follow the path for what could've been just a quarter of a mile of meandering walkway until I stopped suddenly.
You were stood smiling there, drenched completely in your wonder and possibly expecting me.
I smiled and slowly made my way to you like 11 year old playground lovers would.
Your hair was looking so much nicer since you'd allowed it to grow, you flicked it out of your stunning eyes as I finally stopped in front of you. The smile turned into a smirk that all too often made me a little weak as you stared straight into my humble face. Getting almost too close for comfort and placing a hand on both of my shoulders, my eyes scanned your serene face as you started to push me backwards to guide me somewhere. You thankfully stopped after a few paces where I found myself against a tree and you hadn't moved away from me in the slightest. You reached up to stroke my face, the nerves I'd felt before weren't a patch on how I was feeling at that moment.
"I like you a lot," I found myself spluttering then clamped my hands over my mouth. The one secret I'd kept from everyone was now hanging in the air in front of the very person it was about.
A stereo playing in the distance caught my attention but you didn't appear to have heard it, only smiling wider at me as you drew closer to my face and I knew what was about to happen. Finally.
But it didn't.
You stopped only centimetres away from my face, those splendid eyes converging into one as you were that close. A satisfied sigh escaped your mouth, like you too had been thinking about this one moment far too long and often. Finally, you opened your mouth to whisper something,
"SHOOT THE RUNNER, SHOOT SHOOT THE RUNNER."

The trees shifted into the ground as sky and surroundings became a casual lilac that was certainly familiar. I clung to you, to this moment but you were slipping away from me. I sank to the ground in defeat but it was far too soft to be the tree root under me. I saw a Miffy calendar swinging in the breeze as it dangled from a tree branch and several bats fluttering as the wind toyed with them too. Curtains fluttered from another tree and a bedside table cluttered with make up and books stood proudly were you had once been.
I knew what was happening.
I wished it wouldn't, but it always did.

My eyes unwillingly opened as my sister came bounding into the room.
"Mum wants to know what you've done to the computer," she recited, grinning with pleasure as we both knew I was always blamed for such things and a yelling match was likely to happen.

So much for sanctuary and romance.
And you'll never know who you are.

'Ceremony'

New Order - Ceremony

This is why events unnerve me
They find it all, a different story
Notice whom for wheels are turning
Turn again and turn towards this time
All she ask's the strength to hold me
Then again the same old story
World will travel, oh so quickly
Travel first and lean towards this time.
Oh, I'll break them down, no mercy shown
Heaven knows, it's got to be this time
Watching her, these things she said
The times she cried, too frail to wake this time.

Oh I'll break them down, no mercy shown
Heaven knows, it's got to be this time
Avenues all lined with trees
Picture me and then you start watching
Watching forever, forever
Watching love grow, forever

This is the song that changed my life.
For some reason, it opened my eyes to the world and, in a sense, unlocked my mature side.
Every time I hear it, I get a sense of change or that every thing's going to be okay, and it's quite fascinating.
The first time I heard it was on this random girl's profile on the infamous MySpace and I loved it, I believe I played it at least four times then downloaded it for myself. She was a pretty cool girl, I wish I'd added her ..

The last three lines remind me so much of my boyfriend, and how much I surprised him that night I asked him out, which makes me smile as I remember.

The reason I chose these lyrics to start off my blogging 'revolution'?
Why, because they've shaped the person I've become.